As we turn towards Spring, the remembrance of what was, nourishes what will be. I go on daily walks with Taliesin (who is already four months old!) and we say hello to every tree, leaf, bird, stick, flower and stone we see. Tiny flowers are budding on once barren branches and dried leaves are making songs as they swirl in the wind.
This energy of renewal and re-visioning is not only in nature - I feel it in myself, as well as in my email box with the launching of online courses! Inspired by all of these beautiful expressions, I would like to share with you a little of my journey to here.
When I was an undergrad at Stanford, I had a mini existential crisis as my intellectual aspirations were challenged by spiritual awakenings. My traditional Christian worldview fell apart and I no longer wished to pursue a PhD in Anthropology, let alone complete my Bachelor’s! Why?
I experienced a huge heart expansion at the Esalen Institute in Big Sur in the summer before my Senior year. At Esalen, the courses, majors, minors, masters, study abroad programs, graduate schools and internships didn’t matter. In fact, it seemed like my high-powered mind put me somewhat at a disadvantage.
Instead of researching and discussing theories and scientific models, I danced and meditated on cliffs overlooking a vast sea. Instead of praying to a God-figure outside myself, I encountered a living divinity. After that summer, the worlds of academia and traditional religion lost their all-encompassing glamour and authority.
So, when I returned to Stanford, I took less than the minimum course load - all dance classes and one “real” course in Jungian Psychology. I rediscovered my Dreams as a source of inner guidance. I met an ecumenical minister who helped me re-work my relationship with Christ Consciousness and an academic advisor who introduced me to David Whyte’s book Crossing the Unknown Sea. I also went to yoga at least once a day and joined a community of “ecstatic dancers” who gathered to Sweat Their Prayers every Wednesday night.
All of this, along with daily walkabouts and spontaneous meditations around campus helped get me through and see once more the beauty and perfection of that time. For truly, without that little crisis, I would have taken a very different path and very likely wouldn’t be here writing to you in this way.
Life cycles in a way that calls us to re-vision ourselves and how we engage with the world! We do well when we have tools and guides - inner and outer - to help us through the transformation zones. For, the re-visioning, reorganizing and re-dreaming never end.
Recently (nearly two years ago), my consciously chosen upheaval of leaving the Bay Area necessarily reorganized the way I can work with you. And, even more recently (four months ago), becoming a mother set up a chain of inner and outer events that demanded a new way of being in the world. Rather than weekly yoga classes and chiropractic sessions, we now connect through dreams, Patreon and workshops.
It’s quite perfectly imperfect!
Have you had a moment when your world was turned upside down? Are you in the midst of a re-visioning - big or small? Do you know that your Dreams are showing you the way through and giving you clues every night?
I can help you explore the messages in a way that inspires creativity, ignites intuition, and roots you into your living wisdom! Dream with me.
Also, for the Bay Area yogis, Edwina Ferro, Lydia Hwang and I are joining together again next week for a yoga and sound ceremony - bathe in the sound of chimes and bowls, while practicing mantras, mudras and sequences to connect with Saraswati, creativity, wisdom and intuition. REGISTER here.
Here’s a taste of Saraswati’s yantra and mantra:
Wherever you are, may your dreams be sweet and deep, may you feel the interconnection between the inner and outer, may you find hope for the new and ancient Earth that we are dreaming into being.